good morning sunshine

just wanted to share a few pictures of the sunrise today...

short post

my feet stink and i couldn't be happier.

having stinky feet means that i've been climbing again - that rank smell that comes after days of climbing and then transferring said climbing-shoe-feet into socks and approach shoes.

the weather is funny here... it's normally quite sunny and warm for the weekdays and then the weekends are rainy and miserable. last friday was hot, and i took my signature hot-day-rest-day. the rain began on friday night and finally stopped on monday afternoon.

i have determined that i am the sort of person that needs to be in the sun, and i also confirmed my hatred for socks. socks are evil; feet should be free. so it would appear that i conducted a sort of behavioural science experiment on myself - removing all positive stimuli (sun, climbing) and replacing it with a hostile environment (rain, wind, socks). I came through it okay and had some beautifully introspective time hanging out in the woods in the rain either with complete strangers, or being (blissfully) alone.

climbing is back on and my friend pete has returned. his catches are so super soft and i'm still working the same route i mentioned earlier. it stands at minimum one fall, and i'm finding that just having a week away from sport climbing has killed my endurance. looking forward to pencharz' arrival on monday to continue the sport climbing trend.

here i am on Violator - easily my favourite route thus far:

learning to fly

i've been in the obed now for almost a week, and it seriously feels like about 2.7 days.

there were some other climbers camping up here on the weekend, but the last of them left this morning so i have been returned to my blissful solitude. it's nice to see people once in a while, and i enjoy short bursts of human interaction.

just after i posted my last blog entry, i checked in with pete, the guy that i mentioned climbing with earlier, and found that he had taken sick and was returning home. i was so screwed. i mean, i mean, that thought merely popped into my head after initially feeling sorry for pete and hoping the best for his health and well being.

i felt pretty stupid after declaring my love for the obed, to be stuck here without a climbing partner. i realized just how much of my excitement was based on the prospect of climbing here with a solid partner i trust and enjoy climbing with. i felt completely lost.

most of the time i'm really and truly happy while i'm on my own on this trip. i will admit to having low moments, and this was one of them. all of a sudden reality hits me. i am unemployed. i just scored a free shower as a homeless person at the civic center, withdrew my last 240 dollars and lost my climbing partner. i wandered into the store outside of which i was using the pay phone, and meandered up and down the aisles. oh my god, i'm poor. poor and alone.

i'm driving back to the campground, feeling lost and all the radio stations suck. this place does not have the abundance of solid classic rock stations like alabama. i struggle between a disco-age station, talk radio, and about 42 country music stations. i turn the radio off. need to think. i think about how i accepted the bad times with the good on this road trip. think happy thoughts. what is always my advice to people in times like these? oh yes, breathe deep and smile.

breathing deep and smiling are tough to do right now, and breathing deep and scowling don't seem to be getting me very far. all i wanted to do was find a liquor store, but i know that i can't afford to spend money on alcohol. i decide to just not think about it. i need to cope, and driving while feeling messed up isn't going to do me any good. it's saturday night (the elton john song "saturday night" pops into my head) and i will think about it tomorrow.

my brain's elton john playlist accompanies me back to my new home, and i'm relieved to see a crowd of people. sometimes you just need to talk to other people so you can't hear your own thoughts. i showed up at the fire and felt like i was behind glass, as i stood outside of a few conversations, waiting for an opportunity to join in.

no dice. i need alcohol. i have one trusty bottle of tequila that i purchased in mexico four years ago, when i first began to daydream about doing a solo climbing trip. i rattle around in my kitchen and devise what i later name the "dirtbag sunrise" which is tequila blanco mixed with pink lemonade frozen drink mix and water. i had picked up the lemonade since it was the cheapest thing in the frozen food section since i needed to keep my cooler cool and it's too small for a bag of ice.

the night proceeded nicely and my worries were put aside as we hung out in the hillbilly hottub, i with my dirtbag sunrise. symbolic of the change that has come about in my roadtrip - tomorrow i have to go in search of climbing partners . i've never had to do this before since i've been bouldering the past month and was always insulated by visits of friends from toronto.

sunday morning arrives and i've slept in. i don't even see any of the people that i hung out with the night before, and the guy i promised to give coffee grounds has been up so long he drove into down and bought a brewed cup. one of the guys i talked with the night before wanders by - he barely slept at all last night and he's going back to bed. the morning continues as i wait for pete, who mentioned he would drop by on his way home in the morning. i wait until noon and when he doesn't show i leave a note on my car wishing him well and start the hike to the crag. i'm walking the extra 10 minutes to the trailhead to save on gas money.

i'm on my way to the crag, and will have to find a climbing partner by myself for the first time. it feels like my backpack is heavier than usual as i trudge along the approach. i've only been here once, and it was time for me to do it on my own. when i got to the wall, i was in luck! two gentlemen who i had met at the campground just finished hanging draws on the only route i hadn't done on the warm-up wall. i offered to clean the route for them in exchange for a belay. they offered me top rope, and i felt a twinge of recollection of my days of top roping.

i've never had a solid lead head, and have struggled with it since i took my first outdoor lead fall about four years ago. i back down from any move if there's any prospect of taking a lead fall. i've tried to work through it with damian, but all i did was lead routes bolt to bolt until i got about 50 feet up, then i sat for about 10 minutes before declaring defeat. in my times of desperation i referred to myself as a "top rope princess," just TRing routes that other people lead, even if they're within her abilities.

i can't be that person anymore.

i have to climb with complete strangers, so i'm going to have to lead at my limits. i cannot pout, cry, or whine. after running the warm-up route with the gentlemen from the campsite, i saw another group of climbers arriving further down the wall. they're getting on a route that i did with pete, thank god, so i know it's within my abilities.

i've never done this before, and i'm completely new to leading these grades, thanks to my non-existent lead head. but for some reason after falling off so many bouldering problems, i no longer care about taking lead falls and i just want to climb, plain and simple. i really hope i don't fall, but i'm too embarrassed to take in front of people i don't know.

thankfully i redpoint the route that i had climbed with pete, fighting the pump to the anchors. i will hold on, and if i fall it will be at least while i was trying hard.

later i'm on a route with the same group of people - a funky fun start to a boulder problem (for someone of my height). slopey sidepull layback to small crimp to bump for ledge. why is the ledge so far up? i set up and throw to the ledge and fall. and fall and fall again. falling is fun! i'm not sure how many times i fell, but i finally stuck the move and it felt great. i fight the pump for the rest of the climb and as i clip the anchors i look around at my surroundings and smile. it's my first lead of this grade, but i'm the only one who knows that.

they encouraged me to work for a redpoint, and i tried the route again, this time falling only once at the crux and getting it the second time. my arms are hurting and my forearms are always semi-pumped. i pack up my things and say farewell to the group, hoping sincerely to see them again sometime. i hike back out the same way i came in, by myself, but this time i'm walking on air. the top rope princess has left the building.

living close to the earth

okay, i found another home.

the obed in tennessee is everything i want in a climbing destination.

there are sport routes that are nicely bolted, and there is bouldering as well. there are a number of crags in a number of locations, to keep it interesting. the hike is just long enough to warm you up, but not too difficult. the rock feels like a mix between the red river gorge, and horsepens 40. slopey ledges, and tough-textured sandstone. there are routes capped with large ceilings so you can climb when it's raining. you can also climb the large ceilings (mostly 12's and 13's) but most of them have fixed gear. i'm hoping to get over my lead head and be taking happy whippers off roof climbs. a girl can dream.

the bouldering is great... there's one wall at the lilly boulders that is just like climbing in the gym... it's slightly overhanging with all sorts of holds. you can pick an existing line to work, or make something up (hence the gym comparison). it began to piss-pour rain while we were bouldering yesterday and we just kept on going until the holds got damp. but hey, i hear that climbing in dirty shoes on wet rock helps technique. or something.

the camping is perfect. it's a climber friendly campground on the property of the nicest people in the world. i was the only one there yesterday and they provided me with firewood to get through the cold night, and offered me the cabin to stay in. i was fine in my tent, but still, the offer was greatly appreciated.


red, the uber-large dog, and i are getting along. she got a bit of my dinner last night and ate around the portobello mushrooms. what i'm eating is a far cry from dog food, and occasionally when she's hungry enough she eats the cheap dog food i bought for her. we go for walks together and she looks out for me. i'm sleeping well with a large dog slumbering away outside the tent.

today is a rest day since i am sore, and conveniently enough it snowed as well last night. Red slept in the yurt last night since she wasn't impressed when i offered her the vestibule of my tent.

i expect to be in the obed for a while. when it's sunny, the south facing crags really heat up. boy was i surprised to be climbing in a sports bra on wednesday! there is a lot to do here, an endless source of projects for me. the above-mentioned gym-like wall in the bouldering area has a v7 if you traverse the entire thing. the wall is at least 50ft long. so if i have no partners, i can go work on a really long overhanging traverse. that should keep me busy!

no pictures of the route climbing since i was either climbing or belaying. i'll mix in some pictures of the bouldering, before and after the rain.

it's about an hour drive to find a wireless signal, so the posts will probably be written offline and all be posted at the same time. can't wait to go climbing again tomorrow ... it's really hit me, i just live to climb right now and that makes me so incredibly happy.

girl on the road

it's my one-month anniversary of being on the road. in this time i've been able to maintain a two days on climbing one day off resting lifestyle for over 3 weeks.

i'm changing the name of my blog from daydream believer since the daydream has come true at this point. i'm just a girl on the road now.

daydream believer is from the time i spent at my desk when i was employed... daydreaming about my next climbing trip, or heaven forbid, dreaming about quitting my job to hit the road.

the daydreams are now a reality. i hope to meet nice people, have the car cooperate with my trip, and to climb in many different areas.

the dirtbag has arrived!

so i've made it to the obed. yesterday was another driving day, and i made it to wartburg, tennessee just after sundown.
i opened up my laptop to look at the directions that i had been able to find online the night before while parked outside a hotel to tap into wireless. i wasn't able to get to the dr topo site to get the obed guide that i used last year when we camped here.

i drove up and down the highway, and all over wartburg (a very small town) looking for something that resembled any of the sets of directions i had with me. i've really got to make an effort not to arrive in new places with crappy directions after dark.

deciding to stop for directions, i drove up to a shell station and addressed the line up inside: "does anyone know where the lilly bridge is?" the lilly bridge is one part of my directions that i knew was correct. a woman answered and started to tell me how to get there, and a man also in line interjected to tell her that she had it wrong. they were really nice, the stereotypical southern hospitality sort.

the gentleman decided that i wasn't going to make it there with directions, and offered to show me the way. he drove slowly out to the campground with me following. i tried my best to remember the turns so i could save myself in case he was going to lead me down a dead end dirt road. honestly, i just hoped he was a nice guy since i was hungry and more interested in eating my 25 cent cheese and crackers that i had just picked up at the gas station.

it was one of my worst nights of sleep ever... i woke up cold enough to be uncomfortable and warm enough not to want to get up and put more clothes on to rectify the situation. boy was i sad. visions of unemployment danced in my head. some friends have asked when it's hit me that i'm on the road, that i'm unemployed... well i've had my moments and last night certainly was one of them. i was wide awake and replaying all the decisions in my head that led up to this moment. since i was wide awake, i also got hungry. now i was so hungry i couldn't sleep. it's easy to feel poor when you're lying awake cold and hungry at night. i (quite literally) was NOT a happy camper!

i heard a growl outside my tent. i felt like i had just dozed off, and now there's something outside my tent, growling just by my ear. i was awake again!! i told myself that it was one of the dogs and in response heard a wimper/whine combo from outside. i whined back, the sort of "i can't believe i'm still awake" and the creature responded with a whine of its own. we whined back and forth and i fell asleep knowing that it was one of the dogs that was waiting for me to get up and play with it.

when i finally decided that it was light enough to get up, i unzipped the door to see that the fly was covered in frost. it didn't have time to dry out since it rained the night before in horsepens and was packed up and then repitched wet. i reached out to unzip the front door, and it was frozen shut. a good effort to the second zipper and the cold caught me by surprise, strangely enough after being cold all night i was still surprised. go figure.

i saw all three of del and martes dogs in a semi circle outside my tent entrance waiting for me and when i looked back behind the tent, i found my growler/whiner/wimperer and it was a huge bloodhound. sure, so there's another dog here this year, big deal.
after making coffee i had the pleasure of meeting del, the owner of this land and he was just as nice as i've heard. he asked if this was my dog... nope it isn't mine, i thought it was one of his. this dog wasn't here when i arrived or when i went to bed, but showed up to take care of me in the middle of the night.

i've been adopted. i said that if i found a stray camp dog on this trip, i'd take it with me. this dog is way too big to fit in my car and i'd by no means be able to afford feeding it.

she doesn't have a name yet, but she tried to follow us to the crag today and didn't make it. when we got back from climbing, she was curled up again (still?) behind the tent, where she had spent the night. my fears of adoption were confirmed since the dog ran to greet me, wagging its ten pound tail.

i moved my tent to a better site (more sunlight and hopefully a non-frozen-solid tent in the morning) and the big red dog followed me around and i walked my things from site to site.

i made dinner, tuna salad - big surprise - and big red hung out with me. she got to lick the tuna package but doesn't seem to like broccoli. she did lick out the pot that i ate out of, which is still kind of gross although she did a really good job. i've left the pot to soak with soapy water... i'm just not used to dogs.

i ran into town tonight to call damian slash leave him ANOTHER voicemail. i had my first run in with save-on-foods... it's a crazily discounted food store that has pretend brands instead of real brands. there's dr pop instead of dr pepper, and all sorts of other almost no name items. i felt guilty and picked up a bag of cheap dog food for red.

returning back to the campground, all of del & marte's dogs ran to meet me. except red. i looked around to find her curled up next to my tent's new location and walked the bag of dog food over. hey, if she eats my tuna salad, she'll eat cheap dog food! i apologized to her for being a dirtbag and told her it was too bad she adopted a dirtbag since this was the best i could do.

she turned her nose up at it so i went back to the car. i was getting some things out of the trunk and turned around to see little tiny close together eyes staring back at me. she was sitting politely about 20 feet away, and let out the signature whine. i brought the bag of dog food back and dumped out twice as much as i had before, since it was all gone and replaced with a puddle of drool.

she's eaten her fill and i'm in the tent now for my second night. i can hear her snoring and i feel good knowing that i've got a huge red dog outside to take care of me. hopefully we'll both sleep a bit better tonight.

farewell to horsepens

well. this place has been my home for three weeks. it doesn't seem like it's been that long since i drove here late at night after a hellish drive through georgia. those four days on my own were quite an experience, but i will treasure the memories from the two and a half weeks that i had friends visiting.

to keep up the traditions tonight, i skipped my shower, ate my weight in tuna pasta salad, (that tradition appears to be specifically mine), got slapped down in a night bouldering session and now i'm burning off the last of the wood. this campsite seems pretty big now just for one person, and the couch by the fire is luxurious.

tomorrow i'm packing up and hitting the road again, to meet pete in the obed. every time i mention the obed to climbers down here, they get really whimsical and tell me how great it is there. i hope it's going to be great.

the rest is a picture post of the friends that i shared this leg of the trip with.

missing damian

damian left today. so did paul and josie-anne... jay is here now, so i'm still covered as far as having people i know and trust to climb with. the temperatures have dropped though, so i got a bonus rest day today due to the cold.
the way i see it, i didn't drive for 20 hours to climb when i can't feel my hands. even if the friction is amazing, i don't care.

i didn't really need to climb anyway, because of a really cool thing that happened yesterday... last week i picked a line out that i really liked. it looked challenging enough, but i could see the moves and believed i was capable of them. i took damian by to see it, this line i liked... but wouldn't look it up in the guidebook in case that would deter my attempt. i walked paul and josie-anne by it to have a look... this line i thought i could do but wasn't sure what it was... yesterday with jay here, we tried it out, and i got it! as i thought, the start was something i was capable of and really enjoyed. the top out was quite a trip, where i ate my words of telling jay that i "liked to mantle for the slopey top outs, instead of whale bellying it". i had full contact jessica-on-rock as i had a rebirth of fear to the top of the route. i was already a way up so in my mind, jumping down was not an option! i screamed and shreiked, and when i finally pulled myself up to the top of the boulder, i rolled over and burst out laughing. i laughed and laughed, stood up and laughed, and then laughed my way down the downclimb on the back of the boulder and laughed a bit more with my friends and very attentive spotters back on the ground.

so now i can look at the guidebook! i got my bearings and figured out what boulder we were on, but couldn't believe the grades. we broke for lunch and i looked at the guidebook again... yes, that route is in the spot that i climbed, and part of the description seems to suit it... but the grade wasn't quite right. i ran over to the campground neighbours, and asked them about the description of the route, not quite understanding the climbing terminology. they weren't sure what a "blunt prow formed by double runnels" was either, so i carried on with my day. it was a really fun problem, no matter what the grade was. it was so exhillarating to push through to the finish, as freaked as i was by the topout.

i continued on to mulletino, my standing project, and cruised through the beginning, and up to two moves from the finish, where i am currently stuck. again and again i tried it, really dialing up the start, but unable to finish. i had to give in.

on the way back, i conveniently swung by that day's earlier whale-belly-rebirth problem. there were people working it, so i asked them where the line was, and the grade.

they confirmed that the true line was what i completed, and that the grade was a (holy shit) V6! my first v6... ... i don't normally mention grades on here, but since this is a new grade level completed for me, and it was in such a great way, i have to admit i'm so excited and proud. if i had known the grade, i wouldn't have even tried it.

i've always wanted to pick a line out on the rock and complete it, with out knowing the grade. i'm going to be a little less guidebook dependent from now on.

how much of the grade is in our head?

she's got a project

she has a project!

there's a problem here that i've fallen in love with.

it's mulletino, strangely enough it's just around the corner and on the same boulder as last year's project - the lowdown.
i tried mulletino last year but could only do the first few moves. this year i tried it with some boys, all of whom were much taller than me, and i couldn't even get to the crux.

sit start with hands in crack/ledge directly above in roof. throw a right heel hook also into the crack further down the roof where it's a bit bigger and the crack splits into a ledge. from there, work hand over hand down the crack/ledge until into place to reach a left hand very far left for a small hold (out left). the cool stuff begins. there's a far left toe hook/foot jam far left on the lip of the overhang. all of this takes place on a roof that is true horizontal, by the way. throw your foot very far and reach straight ahead for an okay hold, and bump to a jug. at this point i feel like a starfish clamped to the underside of the rock, what with my toe jammed up above my head. when i tried this problem a few days ago, i couldn't manage to reach the far jug, hit a crimper a bit closer and couldn't commit to the next move: letting go with your right hand (which has been comfortably and reliably in place for the past 7 or so moves). anyway, the move there is to let go with your right and cut loose, but not the fun feet-off-cutting-loose, but with your left foot still jammed over on the lip of the roof. i couldn't do it.

i thought about that move for two nights in a row.... it makes perfect sense and it's perfectly fine to let go with that right hand and swing out. i had to at least try it, i mean, i usually like overhangs, right?

yesterday paul and josie-anne arrived. they basically parked the car, got out, and got their climbing stuff ready to hit the boulders. we had a brief session just before sunset with them, showing them around a bit before dinner and new year's eve. today was a great, long session where we worked on a lot of really great problems - really trying to introduce them to all that hp40 has to offer, but nothing really scary (yet).

after breaking for lunch, the boys went over to see the lowdown and i rested for mulletino. i was obsessed with that move... can i really cut loose with my foot jammed, and complete the move by controlling my swing out and grabbing the undercling? i tried and failed, over and over again. my improvement was that i could now reach the most positive part of the jug, which was a move that i had convinced myself that was impossible

sometimes it's tough to believe that you can follow the beta of a bunch of six foot tall boys.

i tried the move and couldn't commit. i could see that this was just like sport climbing for me, i had to try the move since it was such a safe fall. if i didn't try, i wouldn't fall, of course and i really was just curious to see if i was even capable of the move at my height.

i decided to try just one more time, promising paul and jo that i was going to cut loose and see what happened. i move through the opening moves and reached for the jug with my left hand - hit it! tried to focus on how great and positive it felt. now it's time to let go and see what happens! i couldn't do it and i held on like the little starfish i am. paul was standing right there spotting me, and i could just see him in my pererferal(sp?) vision. he was saying he's got me covered, and i believed him. i willed my right hand to let go and it wouldn't. i slowly started pulling my hand out of the hold, slowly so slowly until finally i cut loose and let out a scream of pure fear which quickly turned into a shriek of surprise as i caught my swing with the undercling and then completed the next move, still in complete shock.

i dropped down as happy as ever. i can't wait to do that move again, it was the most fun i've had climbing in a long time. actually, i can't think of a time that i have had this much fun climbing. committing to moves you've never done before can be a lot of fun. i am now beginning to fully realize that this trip is all about moments like this. i hope to fall in love with other problems, adopt them as projects, and learn a little more about this thing we call climbing.